Scott King once said “I support the Employment Non-Discrimination Act
(EDNA) of 1994 because I believe that freedom and justice cannot be parceled
out in pieces to suit political convenience.” Martin Luther King himself has
said, Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. I have worked too
long and hard against segregated public accommodations to end up segregating my
moral concern. Justice is invisible.” You can’t stand for one group of people
and deny it to others.
A growing number of African-American church leaders are
growing in numbers to stand against gay marriage and other LGBT legislation.
Catholic leader Cardinal Francis George spoke back in April against the
“redefinition of marriage” and was joined by a number of Africa-American
pastors who are opposed to legalizing gay marriage in Illinois.Willie James Campbell of the Chicago-based
Church of God in Christ said “We are
biblically, spiritually against it. The bible is our guide, our roadmap.”According
to the Chicago Tribune.
Shae Addams, a close
friend of mine, who was raised by her very religious grandmother, has never
wanted to leave her religion as so many in the LGBT communities have because of
the bigotry felt.Over the years as I’ve
witnessed through my life in the LGBT world, so many that literally have been
forced to find spiritual guidance from a religion other than Christianity. Over
the years I’ve watched her go from church after church in rural South Carolina.
She’s been flat out told not to attend, to a preacher directing a sermon
directly at her by saying things like, “God didn’t make a mistake by making
you. You were meant to be who you were born to be.” On many occasions, because
of lack of support from a minister, the members of the church would ostracize
her. I’d often ask why you force yourself to go through this, she’d always
reply, “I’m not letting them stop me from worshiping the lord.” Her faith has
kept her, without the guidance of any actual church, from being a statistic
many Trans woman of color and Trans people period, have become; suicide
victims, drug addiction, extreme depression. She is still loved in the small
town of Pamplico SC; on a friendly basis with the local mayor, a favorite
volunteer among the elderly who are recipients of the meal on wheels program,
yet in the African-American churches of God, she continues her struggle to be
herself and worship her lord without being ridiculed.
I really can’t understand the psychological reasons behind
why groups of people that have experienced themselves, the most discrimination
and denied equality, be the first in line to stand in the way of other
persecuted groups. It is the highest form of hypocrisy. Homophobia, Transphobia
and biphobia plague our community regardless of nationality, race or religion,
but it is especially hypocritically high within the African-Latino-Muslim and
Native American communities.
Now the Republican party, which is on a mission to be
inclusive of minority groups are pushing their anti-LGBT agenda onto the closed
minded sections of the black churches of a America, churches that today even Martin
Luther King would now be considered an outcast due to their intolerance to the
LGBT community. A culture of people with long roots in the church as far back
as the earliest days of slavery are now pushing young LGBT people of color away
from Christianity into the arms of other religions where they may feel
Another Trans-sister that is fighting for
her faith in God is Meggan
Summerville,blogger of Trans-girl at the cross,
who says, “I think that many in the Christian church on a whole have forgotten
that Christ has called us, above all else, to love one another. This is not the
love many of us know. It has nothing to do with mutual love, a give and take
type of love. It is the love God has shown us, the love of Christ showed when
he died on the cross for each and every one of us. It’s called agape, a love
that is unconditional. God loves us not because of who we are but in spite of
whom we are and many Christians have forgotten that. Christians are humans just
like everyone else, we are flawed. Many bow to the ways of society and forget
what God has called us all to do and that to love one another.
Whether its hate groups like the Lesbian
TERF groups or the churches of racial minorities, I hope we all can learn that
there is no freedom until all are free and to practice that the same need and
desire to be included in society should be given to others who desire and only
wish the same. I had thought with the election of President Obama, the dream
has been realized; I’m only beginning to understand it is only the beginning.
Dr. King’s dream was not only for us in black America, but for all of mankind,
a dream that all men are created equal, Trans-black-Gay-Latino etc., and to
actually live equally. Dr. King, I hope one day your dream is finally fulfilled
and one day will come, where no man is hated just because he or she is
different from another.
We as Trans people today live in some type of post
apocalyptic Jerry Springer world at times. After Fallon Fox’s recent admitting to being transgender, months later we are still bombarded by news articles and
bloggers who screams her biological gender as breaking news to gain that Jerry
Springer show mentality of ‘It’s a man.’We could wear a T on our head and it still wouldn’t matter to the
ignorant audience type of that style of show. They’d still feel the need to
point out information that has already willingly been given. In their minds
we’re to be ashamed of being Transgender, not realizing we’re not and a growing
movement in the Trans* is to own who we are with pride and living visibly.
As a Trans-woman I’ve had more than my share of
what are called “Tranny Chasers”, those men who see only a sexual fetish or
experiment.As a young teenage
trans-girl, I was only a girl on the inside and had yet to look in the mirror
and see the woman I knew I was on the inside. Neither did my mother, aunts,
older step-sister or my cis-gender girlfriends. They were aware of my
femininity and often responded to me as such but rarely were I given as a
heterosexual Trans-woman, the advice most cis-gender girls at a young age
receive.Every young girl is told by parents,
older female siblings, teachers and girlfriends, “Men only want one thing and
they will say or do whatever it takes to get , just that.” At 20 when I started
HRT and began to develop I must admit men’s attraction to me was very shocking,
exciting and scary all at the same time. As most young girls began to realize
early with guidance the power they have over a man, I had to learn on my own as
the estrogen changed and developed me into a sexual temptation for all
Every Trans-girl gets the shocking day without even trying,
to be perceived as just another female; some call it passing without trying. My
day came on a dreary rainy day in Atlanta GA, I had simply brushed back my hair
weave, had yet to start electrolysis so I hadn’t shaved yet that morning and
only had an A cup at the time, when I walked to my apartment complex laundry
room to do my clothes. All of a sudden this handsome smooth dark chocolate
brother came up to me, he startled me at first and I lowered my chin, to hide
stubble, as he stood in my face asking, “What a beautiful girl like you doing
your own laundry, you should have a man doing that for you.”Being so young, I giggled like a school girl.
He offered to take my clothes back to my apartment, it was the middle of the
day, and my roommate and her boyfriend were there as well as a few neighbors so
I didn’t see the harm in asking him up. Everyone went up stairs as we sat on
the couch getting to know one another. I was sure he couldn’t miss the morning
stubble on my face and I had only been on estrogen three months at this time,
so he just had to know what time it was. I watched in amazement as we talk his
manhood fought desperately to escape his tight Calvin Klein jeans. We began to
kiss and that’s when he finally noticed the stubble and I finally noticed he
didn’t know what time it was as I had innocently assumed he had. I was
extremely embarrassed, I had never and have yet in my life intentionally with
held who I am if I’m being a little slutty with someone. I apologized and
explained I thought he knew, and my roommate’s boyfriend quickly came from
upstairs, making me more embarrassed as I now knew all my friends were upstairs
listening, but grateful he came to make sure no trouble would occur. The young
handsome man left and I realized that day for the first time, I appeared
passable to people and of course always made sure I was “together”, from then
A year later I had reached a naturally developed 32b cup, my
waist was at a lovely 27 inches then and my hips were 38, as a young caramel
woman of color needless to say, I attracted an unprepared for, amount of sexual
attention from men. During this time I met an older, early thirty, very
attractive Caramel complexioned professor at a local college in town. After
months of dating, among my other trans-girlfriends, you may say I won the
jackpot.Not only was he intelligent,
well off, charming and good looking but he adored me like no other man I had
ever known.Though we went to plays,
concerts, dinner, he had yet to invite me over to his place. Finally one week
he pulls up to my apartment to surprise me and asked if I’d come stay the week
with him.To me in my young mind I was
two steps away from hearing wedding bells. I had kept my older step-sister
informed from the day of our first date, never once received words of advice,
she only listened.She did know that
after six months of dating him, I was getting serious with this guy.
At his beautiful home
in Stone Mountain Georgia, there were pictures everywhere of him with
politicians, actors and oh my god, several pictures of him with Oprah Winfrey,
after being on her show several times. I was in heaven as he told me to have a
look around while he showered for dinner. Don’t ask me why, to this day I’m not
sure why I did, call it my female intuition, but I found myself opening the top
dresser drawer in his bedroom.To my
shock they were filled with women’s lingerie everywhere, so I opened the second
drawer, it was filled with tons of pictures turned upside down dated only a
month ago of him and a very pregnant woman.When he emerged from the shower, finding me holding the picture of a
pregnant woman, he had to admit. He was married and I had never seen a ring
because he always took it off before he came to see me. His wife at the time
was in the hospital and had just given birth to their first child. Not only did
I felt like the great whore of Babylon, but foolish and dumb. How had I not
known to ask, it had never occurred to me he could be married or even more with
a current pregnant wife. I asked him to take me home, too much in tears to
argue and he dared not open his mouth on our way back to my apartment.I called my step-sister, crying telling her
the whole awful story, with little understanding or sympathy.
Long story short,
four years later after moving back to South Carolina, one day while my Mom and
I went to lunch together, she asks, unexpectedly as only a mother can, “so why
were you dating a married man in Atlanta?”I was floored, yes all my conversations of hopes for advice from an
older step-sister were all being repeated back home, and the entire family knew
I had dated a married man. Trans-girl or not, I knew this much at least was
frowned upon, especially in my family and only served their image of being
Transgender as an overly sexualized homosexual. I explained my innocents to my
mother, that I never knew and he had lied to me, but she remains to this day
the only one who knows the truth of my innocents. Needless to say my
step-sister still to this day don’t understand why I don’t call her like I did
back in the days when I lived in Atlanta.
Well what does this have to do with the title right? Well
because there are many issues facing being Transgender and dating. Most of us
that started transition early without the support of family face a male world
as a beautiful woman destined to be devoured. There are men and women who have
no preference in dating cis or trans gender, and those that seek out dating
transgender people.As an alone in the
beginning most Trans-people feel, as if we are the only ones feeling this way.
There are men, who think they are the only men who want to date Trans-women,
not everyone is on a Trans dating site or come in contact with other men that
have, will or is dating a transgender woman. Recently I found this post titled,
you date a Transgender?”Looking at
the comments and the poster’s profile it was an obvious attempt to have a bunch
of people bash Transgender people. Surprisingly the opposite has happened. To
the answer will you date a transgender, which in itself says a lot, sort of
like, would you date a black, or white or a gay, so you know where the poster
hopes to lead the conversation, to a big Jerry Springer like spectacle of Trans
people, but the answers are nearly 50-50 as of 20 hrs after the post and if you
can resist reading some of the negative comments which should not matter to you
in this universe, what I did find interesting is the demographics of who said
Of those currently surveyed to say yes, they would date a
Transgender person. The most yes in each category is;
Gender: Females 47% said yes (very interesting)
Age group:25-34 said
yes by 57% (so this is the age group I should be focused on, lol)
Religious affiliation:Pagan’s said yes by 89% (not so surprising)
Political Views: Progressives said yes by 90% (not
Sexual Orientation: Bisexuals said yes by 90% (not really
Relationship status: It’s complicated said yes by 67%
(figures, those unhappy in relationship, cheaters lol)
Zodiac: Cancer’s said yes by 73% (this was funny to see)
Education Levels:Current high schools said yes by 56% (Interesting as this could be a
reflection of the future attitudes towards transgender dating)
Employment status: Part-timers said yes by 52% (my man is
going to be broke, hooray)
Career:Advertising/graphic design said yes by 100% (Gives a girl hope, lol)
thousand/yr or less said yes by 53% (oh my god, sardines for dinner, lol)
And the states coming in the highest that would date a
Transgender person all at a 100%; Pennsylvania, Connecticut, West Virginia,
Minnesota, South Carolina, Alaska, Kansas, Idaho and Louisiana.
Over all after 20 hours into the post 117 vote No and 114
The reason I find this interesting, even though it’s not a
scientific study, but that it was a post, meant to be mean spirited and even in
that climate the results are nearly 50/50. Which means little to you if you are
Transgender because of course you know dozens of men and women that would be
willing to date you, but to those who feel alone and feeling they are the only
ones with desires to date a Transgender person, it proves even in a post meant
to be humiliating to Transgender people, that there is way more support than
not. Imagine if one of us, Transgender people were to post this, the result
maybe even more in favor of dating someone who is Trans. I’m glad it has yet to
receive the perception the poster intended, but I doubt it will remain up long
once he sees that not everyone is as closed minded as he hoped and it would be
nice to get a more scientific approach on dating habits of the Transgender
community cause as I explained earlier, we all could use some advice.
PS: No fear, I’m a lot wiser these days about men than I was
nearly 15 years ago, lol.
I rarely share my poetry because most then, realize how morbid I can be. Even attempting to write something romantic, usually ends tragically and dark, but after reading a few poems recently I felt I wanted to share my fictional side, hope you enjoy.
She’s one of the daughters of the God of the sea,
Being murdered by you,
She came to help
But you stone the already battered soul.
That cat even knows,
You, just go on with your flow.
Or open your soul’s eyes
See the corpse before you
Symphonies of a thousand composers,
oozing like pus out of her veins.
The paint of countless artists,
on her skin.
A dramatist tears,
flows from her eyes
as black as tar,
with the stench of Hades.
Your sins are with her
Now rape her body with your eyes
See her radiant,
Beauty, you think undeserving
Independent and wise
Continue choosing your illusions
Scares dressed in lace so you can feel okay,
Never seeing how the scars grow,
Never seeing how powerful you re to her as well.
Hammer her head,
So that her brains drip off her body,
like the thoughts of a writer,
onto his sheets.
That you fool
Was the last daughter
Of the Great God
of the sea
Your muse if you will.
She could walk your soul to the gates of Satan’s door
Rattle your brain
until your thoughts are no longer yours.
Fantasies never fulfilled,
Empty marriages and empty carriages,
A rotting womb and barren tombs
Rejoice for death
Remorse a birth
A blank stare into the abyss
A never ending reach
For the next process
And still you tempt.
She longs to give.
Inspired dreams yet dreamt.
A thousand songs yet sung.
Endless midnight readings.
Never ending green landscapes,
seen in deserts.
Waterfalls seen in a metropolis.
To a tapestry that never ends.
Only when gone will you know
She had been your muse,
Blood (?) by Italian artist Deaz Dripping
From your hands.
Ofcourse I believe you should come away with your own meaning, but have had so many friends think it was just a blood and gore poem, its really meant to symbolize what it means to your inner muse, when you don't follow your dreams and heart.
There’s so many ways to celebrate the duality that is being
Trans and we should.So often we’re
faced with the doom and gloom of living in a world that discriminates against
us and may cause us to doubt at times our own self worth, but why should we? We as Trans-people are extremely special in
so many ways. Unfortunately so many words or labels we’ve once accepted we now
quickly discard, due to those who have exploited those terms in derogatory ways.We’ve given those that have distorted the
meaning, the power. When I was a young
trans-gal in the mid nineties, just starting HRT, how we loathed the word,
shemale. There was nothing more humiliating.We were more satisfied at the time, with the term Tranny over shemale,
but as time has proved, they’ve made that as ugly and as shameful. Now as a
community we’ve discarded that from our vocabulary. One I will not let them take
is; Best of Both Worlds, because we are just that. We’re a unique special two
spirited people with a long history in the human race.
spirited people; long before the white Europeans stole the land of the Native
Americans, two spirited people existed. In this land we call North America
there is nothing more traditional than two spirited people. Two spirit people
were considered a third gender of people and were a fundamental institution among
mot tribal people. Male and Female two spirit people have been documented in over
a 130 tribes in every region of North America. Two spirits usually indicates a
person whose body simultaneously manifests both a masculine and feminine
spirit. They were highly respected in their tribe and were considered healers,
fortune tellers, matchmakers and to have a child named by a two spirit person
was to have a lucky name in life.
In Ancient times we were considered dually-gifted and
respected. What we understand as transgender today had often been understood
quite differently at various periods in time. In the earliest ages, people who
were seen to bridge the genders were often thought to possess wisdom that
cis-gender people did not and were often exalted in society for this. Roman
historian Plutarch depicts “the
Great Mother” as an intersex deity from who the two sexes had not yet
split. Transgender depictions of the
Great Mother and her priestesses are found in ancient artifacts back to the
earliest civilizations in Mesopotamia, Assyria, Babylonia and Akkad. In ancient
times there were no words such as homosexuality or bisexuality, most just
Depiction of Bogas, known eunuch lover of Alexander the Great
Today eunuchs or Hijra,
as they are commonly referred as in India and other parts of south Asia; perform
blessings in the form of dances at birth ceremonies and weddings. Though now,
modern bigotry plagues this group as it does transgender people everywhere.
Whether it is two-spirited or eunuchs’, today transgender people are highly sexualized and the classic terminology used in the growing industry of transgender porn is to market us as the best of both worlds. But discarding this term, due to its negative use, is denying the truth, that in fact we are the best of both worlds. It may seem shallow and only sexual when we hear most transgender admirer’s state that we as transgender people posses a rare inner beauty and are indeed the best of both worlds. But just by entertaining their reasoning’s is sometimes really intriguing, cis-gender women who admire trans-men may often say that their masculinity is much more real and unstained and are better at comforting women, many cis-gender men admire trans-women for their femininity and their tenderness to the male ego. Without stating anymore of the obvious in mental and physical changes, because of the great opposition we face in society, transgender people regardless how young or old are known to also have thick skin and become very wise, very fast. We are stronger than I think we give ourselves credit for at times. While society at large seems to continue the gender war between male and female, and sexual wars of heterosexual and homosexual, we have the wisdom to see all the sides, the negative and positive of both. Those of us that due to the drastic physical changes that we receive from testosterone and estrogen and can resist being servants of Narcissus; a fixation with oneself, many are wise beyond our years, make great loyal trustworthy friends and because of a duality in mental thinking make great artist, writers, politicians, business people, psychologist because we are all just a little better at seeing all sides of things that are usually missed by cis-gender people.
Of course, I’m not implying we are better or superior to
cis-gender people, but given the facts of history, we are an equal contributor to the human race. Equality for third gender people should be the norm, and should not have to be fought for like crumbs in the streets from people who are as mortal as we are, with no more of a supreme right than we have to dictate the meaning of life. Society today is nothing more than left over debris from the dark ages. A time when people thought it best to punish themselves for any personal pleasure, happiness and believed in so many superstitions that made rational thinking of the time nearly equivalent to the cave man era. We are still living off the residue of that era, limiting the imagination of the human race because of medieval beliefs. We as third gender people, do have a lot to be proud of as a group of people.
For those of us alone and felling there is nothing to live for, these are
reasons to realize how special you are. We have a spiritual purpose, past and
future for mankind. We have attributes that due to our misfortunate birth
defects and the way society responds to it, makes us see things in not so rigid
ways. A prime example is the bathroom debacle; cis-gender can’t get their minds
beyond sexuality and sexual desire. While it is as plain to most of us like the
paint on the wall, it baffles many of us why they can’t. I think personally
this is part of our gift to the world, our purpose to help all of mankind to
transcend to a higher level of consciousness, because we truly are, the best of
both worlds. More supportive scriptures from the Holy Bible supporting the inner beauty of third gender people: 1 Samuel 16:7 "But the LORD said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart. Zechariah 12:1 "The burden of the word of the LORD for Israel, saith the LORD, which stretcheth forth the heavens, and layeth the foundation of the earth, and formeth the spirit of man within him." John 7:24: "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment"
I have to wonder did
anyone outside of the LGBTQI and our allies even notice today was IDAHOBIT.Driving around, flipping through sirus xm
radio, no one was talking about it. Flipping the remote, I never heard it
mentioned. Did the world stop anywhere and decided to be kind to the LGBT
community?How many in the community
even knew it was such a day, our day of respite from hate.
This day of I.D.A.H.
& Transphobia is held every year as a rallying event offering an
opportunity for people to get together and reach out to one another, many LGBT
organizations have been highlighting this day, as a coming together event. We
should also start within the community by acknowledging it’s actually IDAHOBIT
day, the b for biphobia.The fact
Biphobia was ignored on facebook post, news articles and blogs, only reminds us
that even we, the LGBT community have a way to go with phobias. Totally
ignoring a group is a form of exclusion.
The main purpose of
IDAHOBIT, is to raise awareness, which in turn provides an opportunity to take
action in dialogue with the media. Oh the media, those supposedly college
educated, unbiased, free speech journalist like those at the Cleveland
Plain, whose coverage of the brutal murder of someone’s child, friend,
sister, Cemia Acoff began with their title “oddly dressed body found in Olmsted
Township pond identified” and continued on a number of occasions to refer to a
trans-female as he and him.Even after
outpours from the Trans community, an apology or any corrective language is
still being ignored.
Even today on
IDAHOBIT day, the global facebook
page for the event experienced a vicious attack on their website causing
the page to be temporarily inaccessible.We face this way too often, and I’d like to say what’s good for the goose
is good for the gandor and serve it back at them, but fighting ignorance with
ignorance only gives birth to morons. Most LGBTI people have to deal with homophobic
or transphobic harassment, verbal abuse and many have been physically attacked
just for being who they are.As a result
of homophobia and discrimination, LGBT young people are more likely to start
using drugs, self harm or attempt suicide.
There is always hope,
last year, very few countries have passed legislation on the federal level that
would include fully fledged legal recognition of LGBT couples in marriage,
adoption, inheritance, workplace protection and insurance rights.So far this year, several state have joined
the ranks of those offering marriage equality, to date the total is 12.Many states, and proudly my own here in S.C.
are working on laws to protect LGBT people from discrimination in the
workplace and in housing.
Yet while we hold our
hands out for equality and for an end to homophobia, transphobia and biphobia,
there are great divides still within the LGBT communities. Transgender people
of color not feeling included in the great gender awakening. There are
heterosexual Trans people feeling pushed aside by the gay and lesbian
transgender community who view any celebration of Trans-female or Trans-male
beauty as overtly sexual and therefore a negative. Also Trans-men who feel
separated by gender from Trans-women and vice versa.Sadly there are still Gay and Lesbians in
power who view Transgender as a choice, all while screaming they were born this
way and I will add sad when the phobia is reversed and those within the Trans
community not being open to LG people and cross dressers and all of us seem to
have ignored the B and I and Q today. Don’t you think they view that as a form
To me, asking for the
world to cease Homophobia and Transphobia just seems to be a very steep hill to
climb when we’re not totally being honest and inclusive to all within our
community.Obviously it is a great cause
and should be supported, but maybe one of the easiest ways to acknowledge the International
Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT), is when you
head out this weekend to the clubs, bars or any social events with large
gatherings of LGBTQIA friends and give a hug, pat on the back or
acknowledgement of your support to someone in the community…that is not like
Beautiful Videos supporting an end to discrimination, the second being from the Anti-Defamation League and is powerful and moving to imagine, great peace makers of our time still with us.
The proof is in the pudding as some will say, for those cis-gender
people who oppose Transgender people or think it is a choice that someone makes
to change their sex.Gender is more than
what lies between your legs. Currently here in Charleston, South Carolina,
parents Pamela and John Mark Crawford are listed as
plaintiffs in a lawsuit against several doctors from Greenville Hospital
and the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston. According to the Civil Action
Complaint filed with the United States District Court for the district of South
Carolina, Charleston Division;The
Lawsuit challenges the decision by government officials and doctors to perform
an irreversible, painful and medically unnecessary sex assignment surgery on a
sixteen month-old child in state custody.
In late 2004, two twin babies were born in Greenville, SC,
each with a weight less than two pounds.After a few weeks the twins’ mother abandoned them and stopped visiting
the newborns at the hospital. There was no father present either.Eventually one of the twins, a girl, died. M.C.,
as the other minor is referred as, spent nearly three months in the Greenville
Hospital. Unbelievably, medically trained doctors viewed the infant as a
medical mystery because they could not determine if the child was male or
female, totally uneducated in a medical condition called intersex, a condition that
can even be Google.
In 2006, the Crawford’s had become the new adopted parents
of baby M.C. According to the Intersex Society of
North America, a rare intersex condition called ovotesticular
disorder of sexual development affects only one out of every 83,000 babes.According to the Post
and Courier, court papers say physicians alternatively identified M.C. as
male and female in medical records. Not once in any article regarding this
issue does it states once, anywhere I’ve read that medically trained doctors
were aware of a medical condition of intersex people.
Doctors at the Greenville Hospital was so ignorant of this condition,
the child at some point had been transferred to the Medical University of South
Carolina.Surgeons took upon themselves
to remove evidence of M.C.’s male reproductive organs at the unthinkable age of
16months old.It is still unclear why
the doctors decided on assigning the child as female rather than male. Though
as Transgender we know that mtf SRS is more common and with less complications
than ftm surgery and had these hospitals had any communication with any
transgender organizations or intersex groups, they would have known this and to
also know, the child will yet let you know in time, their choice in gender.
to the Advocate, “God made M.C.
the way he is, but with one unnecessary surgery, the state of South Carolina
irreparably injured him,” said Anne Tamar-Mattis, executive director of
Advocates for Informed Choice. The parents tried to raise their little
girl as a typical girl, but it became obvious quickly that she preferred to be
a he and now at the age of eight has become vocal and insistent on being referred
to as a male.Bringing to mind the
plight of many intersex individuals as well as Transgender people, who mind and
spirit does not match what is between their legs.
When will cis-gender society get it, even at the cost of
ignorant doctors who took upon themselves to assign a sex, those assigned
genitals became an unwelcomed birth defect, in the eyes of an eight year old
boy. Now regardless of an outcome of a lawsuit young M.C., will live his life
as a transgender man faced with the discrimination as many do, of our one track
minded, bigoted cis-gender society?A society
that attempts to deny him from restrooms he was even born physically to use,
forced to carry F for female on his birth certificate denying him chances and opportunities
for work, because South Carolina does not allow any transgender person born
within its borders to change gender on I.D. without proof of SRS and two
letters of recommendation from psychologist. All because a society of ignorant
cis-gender, Doctors decided in their eyes and in their minds what sex he was to
them and as many Trans American’s know, society does not understand what makes
a person male or female, it is not genitalia.
I hope the pre-historic medical community of this state can
learn from this, educate themselves and also educate our political leaders and
society to better understand intersex and gender dysphoria people. Maybe the
biggest lesson the whole country can learn about Transgenderism from this is,
regardless what is or given between a person’s legs, their gender is determined
in their mind. Need Proof? Follow this case.
Update: Video of the Crawfords speaking about their intersex child who now insist on being male;
It’s taken me a minute to finally get this book, then
another to finally get the chance to read it.Half way through I began kicking myself for taking so long.Its description on
Amazon states it’s a true rags to riches of an African American Transgender.
It is so much more. This seems to be the first popular memoir to be written in
America by an African American transgender.Written with a total open book honesty approach, it is a pleasant escape
of the usual ‘how I transitioned on hormones’, transgender story.Even if you choose to ignore that she is
transgender, you’d see simply, the struggle of any woman finding herself in
a world faced with the obstacle of being born poor and in rural
America. However, this is based on a
true story of a gender confused young man into an educated proud African
American Trans-woman. It first sparked my interest because the author is southern
and born only three hours north of me in Jacksonville, North Carolina.Immediately, I thought, here is a girl like me
that knows what it must mean being Trans in the south. She faced living in a
homo and transsphoic minority group and battling gender dysphoria and plagued in a society filled with drug
addictions and prostitution, Toni Newman found a way to rise. What I loved most about this book is how it’s not simply
about her taking hormones, or dwells on how those around her grew to change and
accept her, but how she grew to accept herself.Staying strong in a world that says, you can’t, she understood she
could.While I’ve written about trans-women
attitudes towards trans-women who are showgirls, porn stars or in prostitution,
she also proves in her memoir that it is not always an easy choice not to make.Many Transwomen are lead many times
unwillingly into the sex industry profession, faced with rejection of family, denied work
and unable to afford the basics of life, many turn to satisfying the hypocritical
fantasies of cis-gender society.The
society that will not acknowledge you has a human in public but willing to exploit
Trans people as their sexual fetishes. Many, as did Toni Newman, used this in
life not as a crutch or a way towards self destruction but only as a stepping
stone and grows to learn to use the sex industry to become the fullest human
they can become. In more ways than one, this book reminds the reader, all is
not what it seems.
Also what’s even more exciting, you’ll soon be able to see
part of the novel transformed as well, into the feature film Heart of a Woman, Directed by
British Film Director Keith Holland and starring Transgender actress, Angelica
This is a powerful story of a Trans-woman of color that will
not become a victim, a statistic or another Trans person for cis-gender society
to pity, but about a woman who uses the resources given to her...to rise.
The below interview with Author Toni Newman is from proudtobeout.org
For more info on Toni Newman the author and link to purchase book: