Sunday, June 30, 2013

Know what is going on your face

By Sabrina Samone, TMP

Many of us use make up, women as well as many men that go for that metro-sexual look with a touch of bronzer, semi-glossy lips and occasionally a dab of mascara for those long lashes on men that women find irresistible. More and more, as everything we use as consumers, the trend is moving to natural, organic ingredients. The makeup industry has had a glaring light shine on it for the past decade, with animal testing and harmful ingredients in cosmetics. The David Suzuki Foundation, a sort of environmental group, has listed a ‘Dirty Dozen’ cosmetic chemicals to avoid.

1.       BHA and BHT used mainly in moisturizers and makeup as preservatives.

2.       Coal tar dyes: p-phenylendediamine and colors listed as “CI” followed by a five digit number

3.       DEA-related ingredients used in creamy and foaming products.

4.       Dibutyl phthalate

5.       Formaldehyde-releasing preservatives

6.       Parabens

7.       Parfum or fragrances

8.       PEG compounds

9.       Petrolatum (Petroleum based products)

10.   Siloxanes

11.   Sodium laureth sulfate

12.   Triclosan

Well that’s a lot to remember when shopping for makeup, but a growing trend in our society over the past few years is to use and concentrate on all things natural. From house hold cleaners, the water we drink the food we eat and why not start thinking more about the makeup we use. The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) does not fully regulate safety of either the US or foreign made cosmetic products, so it looks like we have to all do our own little investigation, but why bother? Because most cosmetics carry Lead, mercury, dangerous minerals that are still not fully understood what they can do to us with continued use on our faces. There’s speculation that some cosmetics may actually cause you to age faster, cause skin cancer and here is one I found interesting for we trans-girls; Triclosan is a compound commonly found in anti-bacterial products such as soap, lotions and toothpaste. The FDA is presently reviewing animal research that supports potentially harmful effects of triclosan, including altering hormone levels in the body.
I’ve had some good moments in my life where someone has asked “what do you use on your skin, you have the clearest complexion?” I use very little products on my skin other than Mac Cosmetics and Ultra Glow skin moisturizers. After meeting a 78 year old woman of color who had zero, I mean zero wrinkles, not even lines around her eyes, which had been using Ultra Glow since she was thirteen. The same age I was when I started, so my faith of having no wrinkles is all on the shoulders of the Ultra Glow line,lol. I started when I was a teenager with playing around with my own concoctions, so much so that my step-father would tease me that my face one day will fall off,lol. From an early age I followed the natural ingredients used by the Egyptians, who were experts on preserving the body. Virgin olive oil is not only a good use for taking off makeup, but a great moisturizer; it protects the skin, hydrates and is full of antioxidants.  Beeswax, rose water, aloe and lanolin in their natural forms are also great to use on your skin. My grandmother taught me how to apply the enzyme from the Aloe plant when I was just a little “girl”, not only is it great for soothing burns, rashes and mosquito bites, but it’s great to soften the skin if used as a moisturizer. An exfoliate that I use is the insides, and mainly the juice of a grapefruit, along with a couple of cups of sugar, lemon juice, a half of teaspoon of coffee grains and a dash of olive oil. You simply mix it all up in a bowl then scoop out a handful, place on your face and scrub in a circular motion around your face and neck. The grapefruit and coffe grains are great anti-oxidants and the lemon juice tightens the skin. Once you rinse you’ll see the results immediately, as its strips away dead skin, removed any excess makeup and dirt, leaving your skin soft and smooth and ready for some olive oil and my favorite ultra glow as a moisturizer. I live by this regiment so fiercely that I’ve even thought of bottling it and selling once, but unfortunately hadn’t found away yet for the ingredients not to go bad after a week.

Model Isis King getting "done"

There are many things you can try other than most overpriced organic ingredients found right in your local grocery store. There are many women and trans-women that prefer not to wear makeup, I’m not and never will be one of them, I love to glam it up occasionally. If you’re like me but want to find more natural products here is a great list of mineral makeup brands you may not have heard of and there is always good old faithful MAC you can find at your local mall. Making use of all natural makeup is the finest option for those who actually desire to stay clear of any unnecessary dangers on one’s skin and overall wellbeing, but look fabulous just the same.
If you have any all natural beauty secrets please leave a comment and share your choices.

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Best of Both Worlds 

Defining who we are pt. VI: The Complexities of Trans dating


Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Going to the Chapel and we’re going to get Married…A bittersweet wedding

By Sabrina Samone, TMP

When the POTUS received the news that DOMA and Proposition 8 was struck down by the Supreme Court, his first tweet was ‘#Love is Love’. Yes today is the day the Federal Government will officially recognize Marriage Equality. The much anticipated ruling was cheered on by LGBTQI people from every corner of this country today. The Supreme Court struck down two key anti-gay laws: a provision of the Defense of Marriage Act preventing the Federal Government from recognizing legal same-sex marriages performed in states where they are legal, and California’s voter-approved Prop 8, which ended same-sex marriage in the largest populated state in America. Thanks a lot, I think, to the efforts of this President we are finally able to see this day, which is bitter sweet for many in the Transgender Community.
While most of the focus has been on Gay and Lesbian marriage rights, it is true that many Trans-lesbians and gays can now marry. Also this ruling will apply to the many people who are pre-op or choose to remain pre-op, to marry whom they love as well. Very little opposition has been towards Transgender people who have received their SRS surgeries and are heterosexual, but in the case of Thomas Beatie’s nine year union, where he was refused by an Arizona Judge from getting a divorce. Thomas Beatie, though in a heterosexual relationship, had retained his female reproductive organs and therefore the court viewed the marriage as null and void. Today’s ruling will affect him and many other Transgender people in similar situations. There remains a large portion of the Transgender community who decides not to have SRS to feel complete in their new identity, so this ruling will open the door to legal marriages.

We also continue to face discrimination in the workplace, housing, and are faced with an epidemic of hate crimes. We are also in a fight across the country for a basic human right, to use the bathroom. Issues that greatly affect the Transgender Community outside of marriage are the reasons behind a new campaign by the Transgender Law Center’s #MORE THAN MARRIAGE.

The bitter sweetness of this ruling also, is that currently only 13 states recognize same-sex marriages that will be recognized by the Federal Government. That leaves 37 states that still refuse to grant same-sex marriages, and 37 battles yet to come for full marriage equality. This battle may have been made easier in half of those states, but the other half, especially those in the south may be harder nuts to crack than yesterdays Supreme Court Ruling. One of those reasons and most that Gay and Lesbian people understand all too well is that their greatest opposition from politicians often comes from the most closeted set amongst them. In South Carolina we have one of the loudest closeted cases within Congress, in U.S. Senator Lindsey Graham, who we can only imagined responded to the Supreme Court’s decision as if he was Scarlet O’Hara, screeching about the heat. According to a statement from the Senator Lindsey (stuck in the closet) Graham, that was posted on his face book page, “I believe in the traditional definition of marriage. South Carolinians have repeatedly said that is the definition they support as well. I have been a strong supporter of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). I voted for it as a member of the House of Representatives, and as a Senator, wrote a brief to the Supreme Court to uphold this important law. I was disappointed with today’s outcome, but respect the Court’s decision. One key point, today’s Supreme Court ruling will not change South Carolina law and I will continue to fight for and defend the traditional definition of marriage.”

Yes as usual, our greatest opponents are usually the ones that don’t realize they are one of us, or refuse to accept and love themselves. I hope and pray and will do my part to continually remind the LGBT citizens of the this state that may want to celebrate this victory today, to remember who stands in their way of true full equality. Regardless of what has happened in the Supreme Court, Sen. Lindsey (miss thing) Graham, has stood his ground and says he will continue to defend traditional marriage. This should mean, with such support that this state’s LGBT groups have placed on supporting this decision, that the same or greater amount should be placed on voting Sen. Lindsey Graham out of office and remove him as an obstacle to the LGBT of this state, joining the rest of the Union in full equality. You can’t have your cake and want to eat it too; there should not be one LGBT person not willing to vote against Graham that supported marriage equality, it is the height of hypocrisy.  
Also, what makes this a bitter sweet moment for many, is the vote against a key part of the Voting Rights Act as blogger Monica Robert’s of Transgriot put it best, “I know civil rights is not a zero sum game, but that’s the way it looks to a lot of African-Americans today inside and outside the trans and SGL community. One group got their rights advanced while the centuries old historical pattern of crapping on the human rights of African-Americans made a comeback.”

While this does mark an extra reason this Pride Month to celebrate, and I’m about to go out and start myself, we are well aware of a fight that continues. These same voter rights that have been taken away, may also be the reason in many of the states that still bans same-sex marriage, a struggle will most definitely continue.

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Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Stop Killing My Sisters

 By Sabrina Samone, TMP

Sometimes in the Trans community we receive positive and uplifting news, like the recent bill being passed and signed to protect Transgender Rights in Delaware, making it the 13th state to add gender identity to its hate crime laws. Sadly, more often than not we’re faced with the opposite. We face discrimination in the work place, housing and faced with the dangers of a hostile Cis-gender society. We’ve been fortunate that states are looking at these issues and passing laws. It’s great that marriage equality is a discussion on nearly every families table in the United States, but alarmingly the violence against LGBTQI people has been on the rise, especially Transgender People, exceptionally high among Trans-women and near an epidemic of violence towards Trans-women of Color.

I, like many other Transwomen of color, is beyond sick and tired of hearing about yet another attack on a Trans-woman of color or otherwise. I’m tired of people, especially those in the LGBTQ community that still supports Transphobic/homophobic Fox News, who are partially responsible for enticing such hate filled rhetoric.
At 1: am Friday, June 21, Bree Wallace was viciously stabbed, 20 times  after being lured to a rundown area off Stanton Road SE in the Washington D.C. area. According to the Metro weekly, the victim told police that she knew the person who attacked her and was able to give a full description. According to the update article, a suspect has been arrested on unrelated charges and Bree spirits are up and she is recovering well.

Bree Wallace pictured
Bree is the latest in a string of violent attacks and murders against Trans-women of Color. According to the Human Rights Campaign’s new Transgender Americans: A Handbook of Understanding on Hate Violence, violence against transgender people appears to be in epidemic mode with hardly a month going by without another national story in the “papers”, of a transgender person who was beaten, raped or killed. I say “papers” because the only news received from our mainstream TV media is silence and if you’re watching Fox News, with their non-stop Transphobic reports, you may be even encouraged to commit such violence. Polling does show that 68 percent of American believes we need a federal hate crimes law protecting transgender people. Obviously then, we in the Trans community, are not the only ones hearing of these horrific violent acts. The country is watching but doing little to protect us.
Also this month, a trans-woman, which was walking along Hollywood Blvd. minding her own business, was viciously attacked by several men, as a highly publicized surveillance video demonstrates. On June 20, Nicol Shakhnazaryan, a 21 year old Los Angeles resident was arrested. He pleaded not guilty Monday to charges of battery with serious bodily injury and assault by means likely to produce great bodily injury, according to the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s office in a report on His attorney is actually claiming the victim was the aggressor. My question is why isn’t this on Nancy Grace, or Lesbian Jane Velez Mitchell? Is this mainstream media’s way of telling the transgender community, especially Trans-women of Color, we don’t matter?

                                                            Picture rom video, showing suspects following victim; below the video    
It would be comforting to know these are isolated incidents, but they’re not. Since April we have had three, publicized African-America Transwomen killed in Baltimore, Maryland, Orlando, Florida, Ohio, with only one arrest in those cases according to Sisters that we will never know or meet are Ce-Ce Acoff, Tyrell Jackson, Coko Williams, Sage Smith who is still missing, Paige Clay, Trans-man Deoni Jones and many more. In fact we are so victimized we have our own special day of the year to stop and reflect on how many Transgender people were brutally killed; the annual International Transgender Day of Remembrance. We light a candle and count our dead. We count the deaths not by a disease, terrorist attacks, or natural disasters, but deaths by hate, hate for someone living their life in order to make them complete and happy.
There is so much more that needs to be down. First we should force that these issues be addressed by national African-American organizations that would normally be in protest mode by now if this had been Cis-gender people. We can also do a lot for ourselves, as women we have to be more aware of a hostile world that would value the life of a woman as less, even more so a Trans-woman and especially a Trans-Woman of color.

1.       Plan to be with at least one other friend when going out to a bar, club or party.

2.       Keep friends and family aware of where you’re going and with whom.

3.       Trust your instincts. If any social situation becomes uncomfortable or feels wrong, remain calm and leave immediately to a safe public place.

4.        Avoid remaining long in an apartment laundry room or parking garage where stalkers can hide.

5.       Carry a weapon to defend yourself at all times; a gun, taser, box cutter, pepper spray etc.

6.       Don’t accept rides from strange men and if you’re a working girl, be on guard at every second, but would advise in finding a safer profession as soon as possible or hire a bodyguard.

7.       If traveling alone, stay in well-lighted, busy areas. At all times avoid walking alone after dark, especially in hostile areas.

8.       While driving or walking, avoid taking short cuts, stay in heavy populated areas.

9.       If at any time you feel someone is following you immediately run, start screaming to the safest area you can find, or to someone or even to a police officer.

10.   And never meet a potential date, partner etc, at their territory. Always meet in safe, well lighted public places, of your choosing.

I could go on with this list and the truth is we are under attack and have to become more aware of it and protect ourselves and we all need to pressure the local media and police to follow up with the cases of those that have had their lives snatched away from them. Most importantly I don't want to hear of another sister being beaten, raped or killed, be safe my sisters and brothers.


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Saturday, June 22, 2013

Defining who we are pt. VI: The Complexities of Trans dating

 By Sabrina Samone, TMP

You don’t have to be a fan of the hit show ‘Sex and The City’ to know of the turmoil of single dating. The zoo of single dating at times may feel like being on a freeway with bumper to bumper traffic, several accidents and way too many road raggers. Regardless of gender identity, sexual orientation, Trans or Cis people can agree that we’ve all had our share of trials and errors in the dating world. A ton of kissing of frogs may happen before you find that prince or princess. In our social media world, which was supposed to be making it easier, it only seems to make the zoo only more crowded.

Being Trans, unfortunately, our problems are usually magnified, and in the dating world its no exception. The pre-requisite to understanding Trans is knowing that Transgender is not sexuality. Trans, like Cis-people (those who have no gender dysphoria in their birth gender), can have any number of sexual orientations. Several Trans-men are gay and many Trans-women are lesbian. A Trans-man who has transitioned or transitioning from female to male is not a lesbian. He is perceived as a male and therefore if he has an attraction to men, he is considered Gay. Gay is a same sex attraction to everything masculine, therefore if one is perceived as a male Cis or Trans that find an attraction to those that are perceived similarly as male, they’re considered Gay. Likewise, Trans-women who has transitioned or transitioning from male to female are not a gay man. She is perceived as a female and therefore, if she has an attraction to women, she is considered Lesbian. Lesbian is same sex attraction to everything feminine, therefore, if one is perceived as female, Cis or Trans that find an attraction to those that are perceived similarly as female, they’re considered Lesbian.

There are also bi and pansexual people, Cis and Trans that have little or no preference between the two or three genders. Bi and Pansexual may actually be the majority of people in my opinion, but popular belief is that most people classify themselves as Heterosexual. Traditionally that would be perceived as any biological (Cis-gender) man’s attraction to a woman and vice versa. Also many Trans-women and men consider themselves Heterosexual. A Trans-woman who has transitioned or transitioning from male to female that is attracted to men, her opposite gender, is considered Heterosexual, straight. The same goes for a Trans-man who has transitioned or transitioning from female to male that is attracted to women, his opposite gender, is considered Heterosexual, straight. Regardless what is or was between a person’s legs, gender is not sexuality. When a man sees a woman he is attracted to, his mind responds to this and his genitals will react, that is considered heterosexual, regardless what the woman have or had between her legs. The same for a woman that sees a man she is attracted to, her mind responds in kind and is a heterosexual attraction, the attraction to the opposite gender you are or are perceived as.

Trans-love or Trans relationships are rarely discussed and are often just perceived by the transgender persons as another form of Heterosexual relationship. The only, yet,  unique additive are that both share gender dysphoria and have transitioned or transitioning from the gender they were born with. This sometimes, maybe the basic attraction; a shared view of being transgender but yet opposite genders. Many who are in such relationships prefer and are perceived to be just another heterosexual couple. For opponents of Transgender people, they have little argument because either way the opponent views it, it is a heterosexual relationship. Not all Transgender people are willing to partner with someone who is going through similar struggles but for a growing number of Transgender people it’s an additional option in the dating scene which can be a remedy to living a life alone. Transgender people are also considered two-spirited people, having the spirit of both male and female and many who have experienced such relationships, myself included, have often referred to the coming together sexually, of Trans-lovers, is that its like having a foursome with one and considered the ultimate duality of the transgender spirit.
 Now navigating through all the different orientations of members of the transgender community, given the fact that mainstream dating sites don’t give us options for transgender categories and your average trans-woman or man is not going to be in your neighborhood bar with a ‘T’, on their forehead, may make finding your future Trans significant other, and some do specifically choose to date only trans people, a little difficult, or if you are the average person that is just open to dating someone, Cis or Trans. Society makes it difficult beyond social media for the majority of us to live so visibly and open outside of our peers. If you are someone who is open to dating a transgender person, you should start by casting a wider social network of friends that you socialize with. I’m not talking about the average “trans chaser”, who is looking for an “experiment”, which most Tran’s people abhor. If that is what you’re looking for there are many places online that provides “lab experiments” for a price. Many though, are looking for something more serious and for those that don’t come into contact with Transgender people may want to do some homework and find local Trans support groups to participate and show your support as a Trans ally. Your input as an ally would be welcomed in most circles and no one would turn you away from joining in any advocacy for transgender rights, but again for those who are interested in serious meetings only, “chasers” are extremely screened by most Tran’s organizations and groups and every maneuver is taken to weed through potential “chasers” from reaching them. Another option are local bars that are known to be frequented by those witin the Transgender Community. In smaller towns and cities these may actually be gay and lesbian bars, larger cities have Trans bars and parties to socialize with Trans people. Do some homework and search online for any of the mentioned in your area.
For the Trans-man and woman seeking someone, we are faced with many obstacles. The first is in knowing the difference between the “chasers” and people who are genuinely interested in us as a person and not a fetish. It’s why I’d advise any Transperson dating a Cis-gender person to take intimacy slowly. This is wise for many reasons, as Trans women, we may not be experienced in the maneuvers of our male suitors.  Your new opposite gender may provide more heartaches than needed if level heads don’t prevail. The same can be said for Trans-men, as some feel, a growing fetish among gay men is to “try” a vagina on a Trans-man and also a few women who are looking for an experiment.  That’s why; weeding through fetish seekers is the number one issue most of us face. Trans-men may also find themselves learning new ways in communicating with females and learning to be aware of what is  appropriate as their new identified gender.
Another is when to let someone you know your dating, that you are Trans. This is an issue for many who don’t rely solely on online dating, those of us that meet someone in life, sparks fly, a few dates later and we are now faced with the question when or should I let them know I’m Transgender. First of all you should let someone you get serious with, know the truth. Sure we all want to just be considered the new sex we are, but there comes a time, particularly in a relationship, that the truth must be revealed. It’s best done sooner than later for many reasons. Never reveal yourself alone. There are countless stories of where this has gone wrong and not in the favor of the Trans person. For your own safety, reveal your truth in a public place, like a restaurant or at your friends or families dinner party. Don’t put this off for too long or wait six months to a year when emotional attachments have been established. This is not respectful and can be emotionally damaging to your date and can be very dangerous for you as well.
When do you exactly reveal the truth? That is a decision everyone has to make on their own, though I prefer what I call a third date rule. Your first date is about meeting and seeing if there is chemistry. If there is, a second date comes and this is when you will begin to relax and get to know the other person. Some may say a third date is too soon, but this is 2013 and usually by the third date good girls have kissed already and bad girls have probably given it up. This means emotions and feelings are starting to build and I choose between a third and fourth date to meet my potential partner and make sure they are aware of my situation. Honestly, sometimes you will be disappointed, but often you’ll be surprised. In my experience those who “couldn’t deal with it” often call back with questions and with some Trans 101 eventually you make it on a fourth or more dates anyway.
As far as Trans-love dating goes, I have little experience. The only Trans-man I dated  was for nearly six months but went rather well with only one major glitch. He was always self conscious of the fact he was 5’7 and I was 5’9. I’m not a stiletto heel type of girl; two inches max unless the occasion calls for higher. Regardless, this was an issue for him and often complained of feeling less of a man because of his height. From what I do know, this is not a common problem and there are many success stories out there.  For any of these topics I brought up, there are tons of material on the internet from blogs, to videos with more insight and maybe even more experience than what I can provide. If you’re faced with any of these issues, talk to friends, online friends, research on line and think with your head and not your heart lol.
At the end of the day, if you’re a Trans person feeling you’ll never find someone, there is hope. Love comes when you least expect it. My previous relationship was six years and we’ve remained the best of friends and there are even more successful, success stories. Give love a chance, dating and relationships can and are more emotionally fulfilling and rewarding than one night stands and letting someone disrespect your body. You are the duality of being Trans, the two-spirited person, you are special and you deserve to be treated special by someone in your life. Good luck in the dating world.

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While it is true a person’s sexual orientation is personal, private and is rude to ask a person, I hope you will take the below anonymous polls on sexual orientation, whether you are Cis or Trans. Click here to take the poll on Sodahead for sexual orientation.

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Thursday, June 20, 2013

Exodus: exit stage door right…no left. Wait just jump off a cliff…good riddance

By Sabrina Samone, TMP

While many are awaiting the Supreme Court decision on the DOMA ruling, what could be taken as a precursor of good news to come, is the exit of Exodus (the gay cure group). For thirty-seven years, fanatics were convinced that through electric shock and other forms of conversion and reparative therapy, they could make gay, lesbian and transgender people, straight. That myth has been proven false for years.  Stories of patients after patients that would confess to the world that they are cured from same sex orientation and gender identity issues only to be ousted years later as hypocrites, confirming over and over again what many LGBTQ people already know, that our lives is not a choice.
Exodus International president Alan Chambers has announced that Exodus is shutting down and will give a televised statement with Lisa Ling on the Own network at 10pm est., onJune, 20, 2013. A day to be celebrated by all LGBTQ communities, as an end of an era, for years they have preyed upon vulnerable, confused and drug addicted LGBTQ people. I’ve discussed previously when I exposed one of their star members, my former roommate as someone with years of addictive, depressive and mental disorder behaviors, for years, prior to being “cured”, only to be rumored to be back in drag, on drugs and walking the streets of D.C. for a fix.
As the bible itself has stated in Exodus 5:7, “you are no longer to supply the people with straw for making bricks; let them go and gather their own straw,” That line from Exodus, may have been ignored for 37 years, and cost the mental health and in some cases the lives of many LGBTQ people, who thought they could be cured of who they are in order to please, family and uneducated churches. Just like the verse, they are finally willing to let the people “gather their own straw”, or find their own salvation and happiness by issuing a 37 years too late apology to the LGBTQ community. Alan Chambers who says according to, “I am sorry I didn’t stand up to people publicly ‘on my side’ who called you names… I am sorry I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine. More than anything, I am sorry that so many have interpreted this religious rejection by Christians as God’s rejection. I am profoundly sorry that many have walked away from their faith and that some have chosen to end their lives.”

According to the Los Angeles Times, Exodus board member Tony Moore said in a statement that, “We’re not negating the ways God used Exodus to positively affect thousands of people, but a new generation of Christians is looking for change—and they want to be heard.” They have pledged to end the current organization of Exodus and start a new ministry that would work with other churches to create “safe, welcoming and mutually transforming communities.”

At its height Exodus International included over 120 ministries in the United States and Canada, along with 150 ministries spread over 17 other countries including Russia, which now has escalated to a potential genocide of LGBTQ people within its country. In fact as of today, a lawmaker in Siberia’s Zabaikalsk Regions has proposed a bill that would allow paratroopers and members of the military Cossack community to physically punish homosexuals by flogging them with leather whips, publicly, according to the Moscow News.

Yes there are more groups like Exodus International still in existence, but Exodus was the largest and most politically influential of them all at one point, though there influence has been declining for nearly a decade. I personally believe they are also responsible for the escalation of hatred of LGBTQ people now in Russia. The effects of negative actions towards a group of people anywhere in the world may seemed justified at the time to the perpetrator, but once that negativity is released into the world, you are partially responsible for the casualties. Like my former roommate that after all the curing by groups like Exodus, is more addicted to drugs because that issue was never addressed, only her gender identity was perceived to be the root of all her troubles. You have to be careful what you speak or put into the world, because one day it will manifest itself into a monster to bite you in the ass. Mr. Alan Chambers, is now full of remorse, with those that have taken their lives on his hands and has given his “apology to the LGBTQ community” a few ruined lives too late, but welcomed by all none the less.

We in the LGBTQ community, Mr. Alan Chambers, will show you the true mercy of God and forgive, cause we know those lives will hang over your head and many others within your organization for the rest of your lives and one day you will have to explain to OUR God why.

The result of so many organizations and evangelicals preaching hate towards LGBTQ people has only pushed them away and have not done what Jesus has called on preachers to do. Personally I remember very well as I sat watching my grandmother's favortie evangelical preacher, Jimmy Swaggert, at the time. I was nine years old. In my heart I knew I was different and probably in the LGBT group that Swaggert spoke against as he pointed his finger into the camera and said, you homosexuals, God hates you and there's nothing you can do from burning in hell, nothing. God hates you. I wish Swaggert could know the pain of that nine year old child, on bended knees, crying at the top of my lungs begging God not to hate me? What had I done so that he would hate me.  A couple of years later when he was found with a ten dollar prostitue it finally hit me, no man is without sin.

Yes this is a Victory, but a solemn one, as we can only imagine the countless lives ruined by bigots holding the Bible and using God’s name in vain.

Alan Chambers Apology Video

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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Delaware is willing to protect its Transgender Citizens

By Sabrina Samone, TMP

It’s been an interesting week for Transgender Victories, starting with the Social Security Administration allowing a person to change their gender listing, then the American Medical Association’s decision in supporting accurate birth certificates for Transgender people. Several states are now taking the initiative to allow room in athletic programs for Trans Kids, all while we await the decisions on DOMA and ENDA from the Supreme Court and Congress.
The fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified in 1868 and states; No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

Yesterday, Delaware became the 17th state, along with the Common Wealth of Puerto Rico, to adhere to these principles outlined in the U.S. Constitution by passing a bill that would add gender identity and expression to the state’s anti-discrimination and the thirteenth State to add to hate crimes laws. The 24-17 vote came less than a week after Senate Bill 97 passed out of the House Administration Committee. Delaware is now the 14th state to include full gender identity protection. New York Legislature is currently considering a similar measure.

Many supports are quick to point out to States that cover sexual orientation under hate crime laws, that Transgender people are not protected from such discrimination based on sexual orientation because they can be straight or gay. The only Republican to vote for the bill, Rep. Michael Ramone of Newark said, “I believe transgender persons mostly just want to be accepted and fit in.”

Today, the fine Gov. of Delaware, Jack Markell (D), signed into law the Transgender rights bill, that will now prohibit discrimination in employment, housing, insurance and public accommodations and includes gender identity as a protected class under Delaware’s hate-crimes law. After signing, Governor Markell (D) said, “Our mission to build a welcoming and accepting state that can compete in the global economy requires laws that reflect our values. Today, we guarantee that our transgender relatives and neighbors can work hard, participate in our communities and live their lives with dignity and safety.”

It is clear, states headed by the Democratic Party are more willing and able to abide by the laws of the Constitution and grant equality for those in the LGBT community and especially the Trans*. Our Community will do well to remember those that have opened the doors to us so far this year and cast their future ballots as such, remembering who stands for you and who’s against you. We thank you Delaware.
States that now have laws banning discrimination based on gender identity/expression and sexual orientation; The District of Columbia, Minnesota, Rhode Island, New Mexico, California, Illinois, Maine, Hawaii, New Jersey, Washington, Iowa, Oregon, Vermont, Colorado, Connecticut, Nevada, Massachusetts and the Common Wealth of Puerto Rico.

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Things looking bright for what maybe NYC first Transgender City Councilman

By Sabrina Samone, TMP

Momentum is building around Mel Wymore’s run for New York City Council with double endorsements from Council member Daniel Dromm and the Stonewall Democratic Club of New York City. With two endorsements in one week, the confidence is building to elect the first openly Transgender person elected to public office in the nation’s biggest city and one of only a handful ever in the U.S., which would make him one of the most influential political Transgender people in America.

Councilmen Dromm said of Mel, “This is a watershed moment. I see in Mel a proven ability to create real and lasting improvements to our city, to bring people together, and to break new ground in New York politics. I’m thrilled to endorse his candidacy and Iook forward to working with him in city Council.

The endorsement from the Stonewall Democratic Club of New York, the largest LGBT Democratic political club in the City and State of New York said, “Mel is a clear choice for the Stonewall Democrats. He is a pioneering leader who has proven to be a strong, effective advocate for our community, for his neighbors on the Upper West Side, and for all New Yorkers. There is no doubt that his dedication to building inclusive communities and to improving quality of life for all people will be an invaluable asset to City Council.”

Though Mel is not running on solely a Trans platform, cis-gender society will obviously make it an issue, but Mel seems to be using that to his advantage. He may be setting an example for other potential Trans Candidates; to first promote oneself as a community leader and use his Trans identity, secondarily,  as proof of strength, courage and an inclusive attitude to all under marginalized groups.

According to the Associated Press, Mel Wymore says, “I want to create the inclusive community, and it goes beyond my personal identity, but it actually lends a lot to my story and my credibility as a candidate. I’m honest, I’m brave, I’m forthright, and I’m willing to stand up for change.”

Many of our Cis gender allies would agree that to live visibly as a proud Transgender does take a certain amount of bravery that may add to the strength of a political leader. It seems the world is witnessing the Trans Revolution; Delaware this week along with several states are voting or voted on Transgender Rights laws, with the largest coverage being California. Nationwide, at least five transgender people have now won city, school board and judicial elections, including Mayor Stu Rasmussen in Silverton, Oregon.

It’s time, more than ever, to gather the troops and encourage all our trans-sisters and brothers to take an active role in supporting our Trans Candidates or to be involved in politics themselves. The revolution is in full swing, all numbers are needed, because there is no turning back until we can stand equal as another candidate and the day comes when our identity is no longer the topic, but the quality of our character is the main focus.

For more information, support and  to contribute to the Mel Wymore campaign visit

And show your support and like Mel on Facebook.
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Sunday, June 16, 2013

One step closer in the right direction


By Sabrina Samone, TMP

A landmark change in a our sometimes confusing government just got a little easier for the Trans*. This past week and an important change in one of our most necessary forms of ID in this country has made a huge step in the right direction to recognize gender identity.

The Social Security Administration will now allow a person to change their gender listing if they provide either a state-issued document like a court order, passport or birth certificate reflecting their accurate gender, or a letter from a physician certifying that the person has undergone appropriate clinical treatment for gender transition. Previously, changes to gender identity records required applicants to provide proof of reassignment surgery. With the new changes all that is being asked you are currently under the care of a physician.

"This is a tremendous victory for our community," said the Transgender Law Center legal director Ilona Turner. The Trans Law Center website site provides more info and links to assist those in need to understand the new changes. Much of the success of these new changes is part by the tireless efforts of Trans organizations like the Sylvia Rivera Law Project, who just two weeks ago participated in a groundbreaking meeting with the Social Security administration, also the National Center for Transgender Law and the Transgender Law Center.

The SSA policy now permits a transgender person to change their gender marker upon submission of one of the following documents that are still required:

  • A letter from the person’s doctor confirming that the person has undergone “appropriate clinical treatment for gender transition”;
  • A full-validity, 10-year U.S. passport that includes the person’s correct gender;
  • A state-issued birth certificate that shows the correct gender; or
  • A court order recognizing the person’s gender.

  • Some have already expressed unfavorable views within the Trans Community as to the fact this may not be enough. Granted it is not the end and be all in full acknowledgement or equality, and our social security cards does not reflect gender other than in your name, but we can't overlook the huge step in the right direction that our bureaucratic government has taken.

    This is huge for thousands of Trans people who have not received SRS surgeries or can't afford them, yet are denied work and are forced into the sex industry to survive in life. I realize there is so much more needed as well, but those with pessimistic outlooks need to learn to make some lemonade out of lemons and realize this is a huge step forward taken by our government to recognizing our gender dysphoria as a hindrance to having a fulfilled life. I'd hope that when political leaders see that the world did not collapse over this decision, more steps will be taken to ensure that protection and equality must continue to be granted for the Trans*.

    One of those next steps seems to already started being discussed and that's to do away with the outdated M and F on state issued ID's.

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